Losing Hope? The Second Essential Skill to Reignite Hope

Losing Hope? The Second Essential Skill to Reignite Hope

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Go here for the intro and first essential skill to find hope again.

Throughout 2024, I felt like I had lost hope. Or at the very least, it was hanging on by a thread.

As a survivor of childhood sexual abuse and multiple trauma and grief events through the course of my life, I had many resiliency skills at my disposal.

I used them all, fighting the infection that threatened to take me down.

This strategy didn’t work.

Instead, once I leaned into the feelings of despair and hopelessness that threatened, the virus’s symptoms began to decrease.

Through this process, two important questions bubbled up to the surface:

  • What is hope?
  • Where do we turn when we feel there’s no more hope?

In the next few weeks, there will be blog posts with videos about the five essential skills to keep from losing hope for good.

This is the second skill in the series. Go here for the intro and first essential skill to find hope again.

Below is the concept, question, and skill referenced in the video.

Hope is Generational and About the Future

“I never have been in despair about the world. Enraged. I’ve been enraged by the world, but never despair. I cannot afford despair. You can’t tell the children that there is no hope.” ~James Baldwin 

Hope Question

What can I do right now to help me and my people in the future?

Hope Skill

When the present is challenging, use your present self to help your future self.

Instead of getting bogged down in emotions and thoughts, focus on how you can take care of yourself and your people now to help the future.

Here’s another video of mine – very similar – that talks about leveraging ourselves now to help ourselves in the future.

Easy examples of this are chores or self-care tasks –

*Brush your teeth regularly now so that you will not have serious dental issues in the weeks, months, and years ahead – or –

*Make sure your car windows are rolled up all the way now so that you don’t have to deal with water damage later – or –

*Prune that blackberry bush now so that you don’t have a bigger mess later in the summer when you want berries

(Why yes, these are all personal to me, lol)

Examples of Hope for Our Future

Use the rage, anxiety, and depressive symptoms to fuel your current actions for yourself and those that you care about. Some examples include:

  • getting involved in causes you really care about
  • getting your affairs in order, such as life insurance, wills, trusts, and advanced directives
  • downsizing and give stuff away that you don’t need or want
  • creating a garden and teach people you love how to grow food and plants
  • taking a class (or more) in what you want to learn, like building wealth for the future
  • healing old wounds, making amends, facing fears, grieving
  • gathering photos and transcribing stories to pass on
  • figuring out what lights you up and spending time doing that with loved ones
  • finding your specific meaning and purpose (hint: there’s likely more than one)
  • …and more

This is definitely a tough time with difficult emotions, especially if you’ve already been through trauma and grief events. Do what you can now to help yourself in the future. It DOES make a difference.

Feeling Hopeless? Let’s Chat!

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